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Hello All

Here I am again. I am going to start my journey with you as promised. As you can imagine, it will take me several days or more to play catch up and fill you in on everything. I want to have the catch up part done by Sept 7 when classes start up again. After catch up, you will follow me as I finish (or will I?) the program I am in at college. For now, here is where it all started.

My Journey

In 2005, I was a person who felt they deserved things. I was a very bitter person. I felt like things should happen and be given to me because of the life I had. To this day, I don’t wish the life I have had on anyone. My parents divorced when I was 10, my grandmother who I was incredibly close with passed away from leukemia when I was 13, and I grew up dealing with a mentally ill uncle.

I also attributed some of my attitude to the people I dated – the WRONG people. The guy I dated prior to my husband broke up with me over the phone right before opening night of a play I was stage managing. Seriously? Man up and tell me in person – Over the phone! He told me his life was a sinking ship because he lost half of his portfolio in the tech crash in 2001. My father joked and said he should have went down with the Titanic! This commitment phobic had philosophies about money that I bought into.  I wanted money. I wanted the person I was with to be able to have money. Living paycheck to paycheck was not an option or the life I wanted. I saw my mother do it (She still is). I saw my father do it. I didn’t want that life for my husband and I. We had been married almost two years and were still living in a tiny one bedroom cheese box apartment. At the time, I thought our situation wasn’t a good one. Everyone I knew was moving into a home or found themselves in a situation where their spouses or boyfriends already owned a home. They were having kids and were financially secure. I thought I was finally going to be able to have some stability.  Since a friend of mine who happened to be in higher position was moving out of state, I set up a meeting with the Vice President and Editorial Director of the company I worked for. I was due for my review.  I provided them with documents to show that I felt I deserved a decent raise and a promotion. I had the IT Director print out reports that showed the speed of my work in comparison to my other co-workers. You could imagine my excitement when I received the promtion. I received that promotion based on the presentation of my work throughout the year. Enough due diligence was done so that the Editorial Director and Vice President couldn’t say no. I had left no stone unturned. My new title showed senior authority while my annual was bumped up $10,000.00. I was happy. The extra money was what we needed. I had the research staff reporting to me. I reported to the Editorial Director. It took me seven years to get to this point. I was proud of myself for the first time ever. Things were going well until my boss called me in her office two months later one Thursday afternoon in early November of 2005. This is where I started to unravel.

     More to come.  . . I am going to enjoy the rest of this Saturday night with my husband. We had a great day. We went to a local zoo, had a great lunch at a little bistro, ran errands, and now we are home. He is making me dinner – Rosemary chicken with a side of tomato avocado salsa and organic rice. Oh did I mention we like to work out and eat healthy? I have a trainer at my gym until the end of October. Don’t get me wrong, we do enjoy ourselves and do not deprive ourselves if we are in the mood for something. We are also very into wine. . . Back to earlier. I had a fantastic salad with shrimp, avacado, oranges and balsamic dressing with a glass of Chenin Blanc. Nice and light on this hot summer day. It’s days like this you have to appreciate.  Life goes on. It takes a day at a time to get through things.

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