Hitting the movies with the hubby. We are going to see The Fighter. If you have all the Optimum services, get the rewards card. FREE movies on Tuesdays. Free is for me!
So, what song is Lisa listening to over and over again today? Here it is:
By the way, after 5 months of blogging, I finally figured out how to insert the video as opposed to the URL. LOL
Anyone else who has a blog, this question is for you. Are you all getting annoyed when you look at who viewed your blog on a specific day and it’s some ridiculousness website that you have no interest in? They obviously click on a blog and click out of it so their website shows up on your dashboard. SO annoying. I NEVER go to these other sites yet they keeping leaving their URL on mine. People PUHLEEZ! Give the trolling and spamming a rest!
I didn’t do any writing today except for here. I went back to the gym and then caught up on DVR stuff I know my husband wouldn’t be into.
Last post Dec 20. Now that we are through the holidays and I am over the cold I had all week, I am back. LOVE LOVE LOVING my break!!! ME time!!! WOO HOO! I have been cooking, writing, reading, watching movies, going to the movies, and seeing friends. I took my mother to see Burlesque – the movie with Christina Aguilera and Cher. My mother LOVES Cher. I have taken her to every Farewell tour there has been in the NJ area. Anyway, the movie was AWESOME! If you are into theater or musical theater, go see it! I was dancing in my seat and ran out and bought the CD for my mother (Christmas gift) and I the same night. I can sing in that range and I have the song Somethings Got a Hold on Me as my ring tone on my cell. Christina has a set of pipes boy WOW! I was all into it! My mother of course loved it.
Now that 2011 is here, I did a Facebook clean out. I needed to alleviate the dead weight that was bringing me down. Some people I thought I had a relationship with but it’s like out of sight out of mind and who needs friends like that! This is going to be a good year I think. The Giants were eliminated from the playoffs which wasn’t so good for the new year but other than that, things will be great! All I have to say is GO BULLS! GO ST. LOUIS CARDS! Speaking of the Bulls, me, my hubby, and my brother are going to see the Bulls play the Nets on Wednesday at The Prudential Center. I can’t wait! Getting all my fun in while I can because once school starts up again, I go back to not having a life!
I still haven’t gotten my placement for my internship, which at first annoyed me, but you know what, whatever. I sent them an email today inquiring. It is what it is. I did find out however, that the illustrious state of New Jersey is pulling my unemployment as soon as I am finished with school. Isn’t that great? They want you to go to school to get trained in a new career but they don’t want to pay you until you find a job in that new career. Lovely. I need to get a job come May!
The holidays were low-key. A lot of family time and WAY too much eating! As I said earlier I had a cold all this week which prevented me from getting to the gym everyday like I wanted! UGH! I am starting back at the gym tomorrow. I had a nice routine going and then the holidays and this cold happened.
We are almost done with our second one act play and I have 53 word pages in the book I am writing. I need an editor and a literary agent.
Some good songs from Burlesque:
Sitting here watching ESPN FIRST TAKE and listening to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7N9PmfpGQrQ – LOVE this song. Singing away. This song has so many meanings for me – Not just the obvious love song type insinuation. I like to reach deeper with music lyrics. I am so into music lyrics telling a story especially where I am concerned. I have a song for EVERYTHING. Don’t you wish you can get inside my head? :p
Still in my PJs cause I can! WOO HOO! I have been so exhausted. It’s amazing what happens when you shut your brain off. The semester is over for me. My last day was Wednesday. Supervisor came. Cake walk! I am waiting for my grades to be posted now.
This time of year is rough for me. I’m missing my father. I have been going to his house on Christmas Eve since I was 10 when my parents divorced. My husband and I are still going over there even now that he’s gone. My 20-year-old brother is a stickler for traditions. He doesn’t want anything to change including the menu – Filet mignon and lobster. My father used to make the steak and now he makes it. I think my bro makes it better than my father (*Looks up* SORRY DAD). Not a lobster eater. Not a red meat eater either. I have to be in the mood for it. I’ll take one for the team Christmas Eve though. My husband’s birthday is on Christmas Eve too so we always have a birthday cake for him. We are going to celebrate it on the 23rd. We are going into NY.
It’s that time of year for reassessing. This has been another year of enormous growth and learning for me. Since my father passed away on Jan 22, 2009, my life has taken such a different turn. I think I have said this in past posts but it’s unfortunate that it took my father leaving this earth to wake the hell up. This year I have seen people’s true colors and realized who cares and who is only out for themselves – especially in the last two months. I think I have also said in past posts that if you cross me once I wipe my hands of you. That I definitely got from my father. I have wiped my hands of things and situations. Out with the old and in with the new. I refuse to be anyone’s marionette. No one plucks my strings except me. This is why I have a very hard time trusting people. There is usually an underlined manipulative motive. I won’t tolerate that. To those that have been in my corner and continue to be, I am very thankful and appreciate all the support – especially with my creative outlets.
I also want to announce that I am going to be an auntie again! My best friend is pregnant again with her second child. YAYYYYYYY!!!!
Switched over to another song I can’t stop listening to – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IsPFDzAGb4A – Alter ego? lol
Well, I got through my presentation in that God awful computer class. Tomorrow is my last day at the high school and then I get to relax for 4 weeks. God I need it. I am completely burned out. My mind has been on overload. From what I hear, it’s only going to get worse next semester with the internship. By May who knows what condition I will be in! I can’t believe this world wind of a journey I have been on since 2005. For those of you that have been following from Post#1, life is a funny thing, a crazy roller coaster with unexpected hills and drops. I guess I was a lot stronger than I thought; yet a small part of me still doubts myself.
I have to get up at 5:30 a.m. so I just wanted to write something before going to bed. Good night and after tomorrow I am all yours again!
And spammers, BACK OFF! I am not interested in anything you are peddling!
The semester is over for me this Wednesday! I am so over it. I have a presentation tomorrow and the school I intern at has a half day on Wednesday due to an in-service which is just fantastic! My supervisor is coming for the last time. I just have to finish the lesson plan. It’s going to be real quick because the periods are abbreviated. I am teaching the Journalism class how to write a crime report. On another note, I got an A on my portfolio thingy. WOOT! That’s 3 As in that class! *CABBAGE PATCHIN AT THE COMPUTER* Tuesdays class is going to be the death of my GPA. I got a 71 on my final because the teacher is HORRIBLE. He doesn’t care and doesn’t do a damn thing. I have to do a powerpoint presentation tomorrow on an English lesson. I am just doing plot structure. Whatever. He is more concerned how hi-tech looking it is.
Now that the semester is over, I can start blogging more. The Spring semester doesn’t start until January 18! I have an orientation before that though.
Hanging out with a friend of mine I haven’t seen in a while on Friday night. She just got married so we are going for a glass of wine!
My husband and I are almost finished with our second play. We sent the first one out to two different places. i also sent some of my poetry out. I am not a great poet but whatever. Life is too short. Why not send them out and just see?
Happy December! Hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving or a tolerable one for those of you that have family issues. I have not had the time to blog as much as I have wanted to. School work and internship work has been crazy. I just finished that mini portfolio thing today – 50 friggin pages. So much for a mini huh? Good Lord! I still have papers to grade, an exam on Tuesday the 7th, a presentation on the 14th and then my supervisor decides he is coming my last day at the high school to observe me. Can you say ready for the semester to be over? I have been so stressed that I have been having like a glass of wine or two a night since Wednesday. I hate drinking during the week because I work out so much. When I finished that portfolio today it was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders but who knows if my work is even acceptable. I don’t know. I am so fried and drained that I will even take a B on it. I just can’t push anymore. I don’t have anything else in me.
I entered some of my poems into poetry contests. Let’s see what happens. I have no expectations but I am giving myself a lot of credit because I stopped doing that kind of stuff due to lack of confidence. Now I just say to hell with it. If they like it and publish it, great, if they don’t, there will be more writings.
The night before Thanksgiving I went out with a friend to have a girls night and blow off some stress. What a Blast! I didn’t get home until 1 a.m. and I can’t tell you the last time I stayed out that late. Good times! We had a very interesting conversation. It’s good to be able to have girl talk sometimes, ya know? I’m still going through the whole aspect of who can I really talk to or trust. My brain also seems to be going through stuff that won’t let me understand it – weirdness. It seems the only place to turn is this blog or a piece of paper.
I wrote another poem last night called Tinted Windows. I’m writing all this stuff about being masked, hiding, who am I, being exposed or being cold. These writings cry ISSUES! LOL! But who the hell doesn’t have them man, ya know? I had another dream last night about a similar subject which I will never discuss because it’s beyond impossible and people would run in the other direction no doubt. I think this is where these poems are coming from. I don’t know.
Three weeks of school left. THANK GOD! I have to put together this mini teacher portfolio for my Monday night class. I’m kinda freakin about it. I mean I am sure with research I can come up with 6-11 lesson plans but . . . Sometimes I don’t have the confidence I should in myself. I HAVE to do it so I know it will get done but how good it will be is another question.
I miss doing theatre. I haven’t had time for singing lessons or rehearsals and performing. That part of me feels empty. At least my words are flowing with my pen.
For now I leave you with this holiday tune – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXQViqx6GMY
I have written 4 poems now in the last few days which is pretty funny cause I haven’t written a poem in YEARS. Are they good is the question. I always base my writing in 1st person. I think I am going to submit them to the Boston Review. If they like them great, if not great. I am not going to sweat it. Like I said it has been years since I wrote poems but more and more I am learning life is about chance and creating opportunities for yourself. If you don’t take a risk, how the hell are you going to succeed? Now if I can only apply that logic to the business debacle. Hmmmm
We are going to NYC again for the 3rd week in a row. Friday we are going to a cocktail reception for SIU Alumni. My husband is a SIU Alumni. I am hoping it’s fun. Even if it isn’t we are in NY. I always feel at home there. Ya know, in my element.
I bought NKOTB & Backstreet Boys tickets for the June 12th show here in NJ. My best friend and I are going. We went to the one 2 years ago at the IZOD. I can’t believe they paired with Backstreet. Pretty sweet. This seems to be my favorite NKOTB song right now – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ji_l0GvKpL4
I taught the honors classes at my internship this week. Period 4 went better than Period 9. 9th I was kinda fumbling for my words. They seemed to like my writing assignment. I don’t know. I am SO over this semester.
Let’s see, what else have I learned this week? I think Peter Pan Syndrome is kicking in. I want to enjoy myself whether that’s with theater or music or hanging out. I also learned that sometimes you need to keep your mouth shut. I am an opinionated person and sometimes that is really hard to do. Every once in a while the Mother Teresa syndrome kicks in full swing. I don’t know. Since I started throwing myself into writing, I have been a HUGE mush with the heart on the sleeve. UGH! That’s a good way for people to take advantage. I don’t like droppin the guard. I think we all feel that way in a sense. . .
We may be FINALLY having our high school reunion. In 18 years we NEVER had a reunion. Pretty sad.
I now understand why these literary names drank. You’re on a high and then a low. One minute you have writer’s block and the next minute your brain doesn’t turn off. Last night my brain actually forced me to write a poem at 11:30 p.m. It was one of those WRITE IT DOWN moments. Total weirdness especially considering I do not write poetry or I haven’t since I was in my early 20s in my undergrad. We went to a character development one day intensive workshop in NY from 11-6 this past Saturday. It was an INCREDIBLE experience. Since then, I can’t stop. I have all these things popping into my head. I created a few characters for future pieces I want to write whether short story or what have you. We are writing another one-act play that is untitled right now. I was able to write some dialogue in that workshop which was great. I have my novel/novella going (I think I have like 47 word pages) as well. I went back to that a little yesterday to make some changes. I have so much I want to do but I have to maintain a balance with my schoolwork. UGH! Again I am so over this semester! I have a had a great learning experience but dear Lord I am ready to just write for a month and enjoy whatever life has for me during the holidays. I was telling someone this morning that i feel like inserting myself into the Lebron James What Should I do commercial and how I know some of the people I am around think I’m probably nuts or are expecting me to fail since I have failed at every other thing I have tried. A lot of people think hi diddly dee the 9-5’s for me. That’s NOT for me. I want to write and be involved with theatre and I WILL write and be involved in theatre. So here ya go –
I have this song on my brain. I love the lead singer’s voice and some of the words and phrases remind me of people/situations
– One of many other things my brain keeps to itself.
So today I am wondering who the real true people are in my life. I am on a totally different path than a lot of people. As I said, while I am going for my teaching certification, my real goal is to sing, write and become better at my crafts. I don’t know what the future holds for anything. I can tell you one thing I have ZERO tolerance for is fairweather friends, people who don’t want to support you, people who only want you to support them and when you do they dismiss you like a disobedient child or people who EXPECT you to live the same lifestyle they are. Don’t come to me JUST when you need something or you want something. Don’t contact me only when it’s convenient for you or to throw me a bone. I am not interested in having someone like that in my life. It’s like those acquaintences that friend you on facebook to keep up with what your doing but never talk to you or ask you how you are. What’s the point of friending me on a SOCIAL NETWORK? If you are with me and in my corner, act like it. If you’re not, at least have a backbone and say so, ya know? I would have a hell of a lot more respect for you. These types of things plus lots of others have been bothering me for a few weeks now.
Just wanted to talk to you tonight world. I’ve been up since 5:30 a.m. and I can’t keep my eyes open anymore. Good Night!